Dealing With Butthurt
About a month ago a model whose work I really love contacted me to shoot with her while she was in town. I cannot honestly tell you how excited I was about the prospect of working with her. She’s something of an internet star in the tumblr world, and I had some great ideas with her in mind. We emailed back and forth, sent each other photos as inspiration, the whole nine. A few days before she arrived she asked me about availability over a couple of days and I emailed her what worked. And then nothing. She completely left me hanging. Didn’t hear from her again. I sent another email but never got a response.
To be frank, I was crushed. So much build up, so much anticipation. Being in LA has meant it’s been easier to find people who run along my same wavelength, but it’s always exciting when you feel like you’re really going to connect with the person in front of your camera, and there’s chemistry from the onset. I was bummed for a couple days for sure, and, in the true art-nerd way, internalized the whole thing, ultimately taking it completely personally. Two weeks ago, I was approached by someone in town that I was pretty excited to work with. Same story, really. Back and forth, exchange of ideas, happy anticipation. We set a tentative date and she bailed last minute. We set a solid date and she flaked completely. Meanwhile, as a special kind of “fuck you,” she’s popping up in my FB feed every ten minutes with updates about this and that.
Two in a row! WTF, bro? So this is my question: How do you other artists deal with this kind of thing? What is the secret to not getting some completely wrapped up in the shittiness of all of it? How do you avoid getting all butthurt at the people in the world who are most likely not bad people, but a little careless with communication? I would love to hear your solutions.
To calm my nerves, I’ve posted some photos of clouds that happened in Santa Monica this weekend. Calming, soothing clouds. Pinks and yellows. Let the puffy puffiness wrap around you. In all seriousness, it was pretty spectacular. It’s completely true about LA, there’s rarely a cloud in the sky, so when it happens, people freak out and stop traffic and everyone gets out of there car like that REM video “Everybody Hurts.”